Tuesday, May 31, 2011


I feel so HAPPPPPYYYY!!!!

Yoga retreat- check!  I earned my first 20 credit hours towards becoming a certified yoga teacher.  As stressed as I was about coordinating the event, I forgot that I would actually get something out of the class.  The course itself delved into the intricate anatomy of the body from a yogic perspective, and I actually understand my own body on a deeper level.  Those knots in my back are no longer a mystery.  My super-tight hips (not really in a good way) are actually linked to those choking tendencies in my neck, and I can use that knowledge to be a better flute player.  Also, reciprocal breathing is NOT a lifestyle.  I am sore today from sitting up straight all weekend.

Mom arrives this afternoon and I am very happy about this too.  Here's something- I love my mom.  All this stuff I've been through the last year- she's really been there for me.  When I had a panic attack in the bank parking lot, I called her and she talked me down.  She's given me so much support and though she annoys me to the max sometimes, our relationship has evolved into what the 4 year old in me needed all along.  It took years to get to this point, but she's finally here.  Can I trust that she'll stay?  It's been a year since our big discussion and it's been steady progress ever since.  There hasn't been a single tantrum hurled my way.  I've needed her in a big way this year, and she's been authentically present.  Thank you, thank you, thank you.  I expected to dread this visit but I just can't wait to see my mom again.  I'm not sure I've ever felt this way.

Work's work.  It sucks to be accountable to other people.  As far as I can predict I have one of three outcomes this summer: 1) I could get that promotion to the other division if the open positions don't freeze.  2) I could stay put right where I am.  3) I could get laid off.  So given all these factors, mom is putting together that sewing room for me while she's here for the next week.  I do have a hobby room (for working out, taking naps and of course sewing), but my mom is the Sewer Supreme and will be organizing, putting up shelves, and is even bringing and extra sewing machine and serger.  A serger!!!  She's also setting up an office area so that I can put some items in an Etsy store if it comes to that.

Regardless, I'm happy.