Sunday, April 19, 2015

Unemployed

There you go, then. 

Careerless. 

Present for The Kid. Every morning brings breakfast together at the dining table. We each have a placemat. I enjoy a cup of black coffee, and she gets whatever creation I muster. I make sure she has a neatly folded napkin and a little jelly jar of juice. God, I love this. 

The recipes I've studied for years, and some new ventures, have found their way to reality in my kitchen. I cook, clean, plant veggies, and exercise.

I'm living the best life I could ever ask for. 

I know deep down it's not forever sustainable. My finances are not unlimited. My daughter will seek her own best life. I may always have an adventurous craving deep in my bones for independence. Forever is not the point. 

Right now, right here, I'm the happiest I've ever been. Love. 

My friend Laura planted some of my Gramma's cannas. Now they live in Austin. My Gramma would think this is super cool. 

Another love. This is my sole nutrition during my runs. One every 45 minutes, but if I run over 3 hours, I start taking them every 30 mins. 

By then, I can barely do the math in my head. 


My running coach won the Cap10k. He's more than amazing, and I'm a better runner since I started with him a few months ago. I know this, I feel stronger, but I have a long way to go. 

I'm the slowest member of our group. I'm ok with that because I know how much I'm giving it. 

Pig and chicken have relocated yet again, but they are still in love. Time is relative. 

The first bluebonnet of the year. Hello, honey. 

Yes, it's a loaf of bread. Yes, it's weeping. 

No need to laugh, thank you. 

With The Man at a formal this weekend. He looks like he's sneaking up on me. 

Ugh, selfies. 

The Kid. :)

Saturday morning's run. Since we traveled to Grapevine (near Ft. Worth) for the formal, I thought I'd get in an interesting long run. The forecast had promised a chilly start, so I added a couple hours sleep to my plan and headed out well rested. 

At least I'm experienced enough to apply sunscreen in spite of predictions. As soon as I saw the bright, sunny skies, I knew this would be no brisk trot. I immediately ventured off my prepared intricately detailed, hand-written map within the first quarter mile. My new plan suddenly became, follow the sidewalk for half my water supply and then turn back. 

Along the way, I found a trailhead off the road with a water fountain, so I took a break to hydrate and rest. The trail was paved and an elderly couple passed by. Perfect. New plan, follow trail for half my water supply and then turn back. 

Finally, the trail came out of the woods and I had to decide whether to continue along the sunny pavement, or go ahead and turn. I let my ego push me forward. Two ladies wearing too much perfume pushed on ahead of me with terrible running form; I sure as hell wasn't going to quit. Hot sun. Eyes sting with sweat. 

I looked up, and this beautiful lake arose in my view. To my left, a couple of men were getting out of their car and into wheelchairs. I felt embarrassed that I could run. I wished I was doing worse, or better, or whatever would help them somehow. An empty dock beckoned, and I ran hard. 

Love. Breathe. Sweat. 

I am here.